Foreign Jizz

The last days of 2014. I worked most of it on my Best & Worst list before heading to Historic Franklin in Tennessee to have lunch with Joe at Merridee’s Breadbasket to sample their fresh-baked menu.

After work, I met Amanda for dinner and a drink (or four) at our favorite dive in East Nashville, 3 Crow. We love that place! I haven’t seen her since before the holidays and, of course, forgot the plate of cookies I made for her. So, I suppose I’ll be forced to continue to nosh on them into the new year.

It’s always great to see Amanda and catch up on work, personal and the latest gossip. We’re such whores for the rumor mill. A good portion of our night was spent checking our Facebook, Twitter and Instagram feeds and talking about how many followers we lost after the Insta-scrub. I learned that Amanda is following Stassi from Vanderpump Rules and now I feel like less of a fan because I don’t. But if I follow Stassi do I have to follow Scheana, too? The question will haunt me for weeks to come. I know it seems incredibly vain, but I can’t stop. Social media really is a conversational killer and I should learn to put it away. Maybe in the new year. P.S. follow me @CMVetrano on Twitter and Instagram.

When we finally took a break from our mobile devices, we discussed our plans to see Zarna – our fierce fashionista friend who moved to LA a couple years ago to work with Nasty Gal – on Friday. I sent her a text regarding her plans and she told me she’d just gotten 4-inches cut off her hair. If you knew her, or any girl really, you know that’s quite traumatic. I shared the news with Amanda, who had also recently had her long mane trimmed (4 inches exactly + bangs).

“She doesn’t know who it’s from?,” she asked. I stared blankly at my friend, trying to figure out how her reply made sense to my announcement about Z’s hair.

I suppose my cross-eyed glance registered with my friend and she revealed that rather than hearing “cut four inches off,” heard “got foreign jizz off.” Ummm… check please.

After we decided to cut ourselves off, we retreated to our respected homes to hibernate for what was sure to be a festive New Year’s Eve.